Ask The Teachers

Question:

I've been a Buddhist for more than twenty years and I've done a lot of meditation practice. But I've never experienced any real peace or absence of thoughts in my meditation, at least for more than brief moments here and there. I've also had the benefit of many wonderful teachings and yet I still succumb to my emotions and old habits. More and more I find myself asking "What's the point?" What should I do about this?

Blanche Hartman: Your question comes up for many of us. When we first begin mediation practice, quite naturally we expect some result. We may begin with a motivation to “improve” ourselves, to get something we think is missing. Meditation practice certainly does affect us, but not necessarily as we plan or expect.

You don’t mention whether you have worked with a meditation teacher or with a group, whether your practice has been continuous or sporadic, or whether you have done long guided retreats. Each of these can be of significant help in dealing with the usual perils and pitfalls that come up for all of us.

Click to read more ...

The Practice of Parenthood

by Richard Brown

My child is sprawled sobbing on the floor, too exhausted to make it to bed. I am exasperated, weary and clueless, but the feelings of numbing fatigue and frustration begin to fall away as I to attend to the sound of moaning (mine or hers). I remember to set down my solid baggage, unpack and get into the adventure of raising my child.

Many years ago, Chögyam Trungpa said something that influenced how I have understood the practice of being a parent: “The proper upbringing of a child seems to be based wholly on the idea of not living out of a suitcase... Parents should be willing not to fall asleep, willing to pay attention, willing to join this adventure on a direct earthy level...” Our speedy, complex lives make it is easy to sometimes feel that we are barely functioning as either parents or meditators. To think of integrating the two may seem unfathomable. We can go all day without really meeting our children. Even when we are together, we may feel somehow disconnected.

Click to read more ...

Reader's Exchange

“Mommy, wake up so you'll have time to play with me before you go to work.” Half-asleep, I recognized this as the first time I'd heard my daughter use time in a linear fashion. She had kept me living more or less in the present for almost four years. I felt guilty for all the times I'd rushed her as she contemplated a puddle (“Hurry or we won't get there on time!”) or talked to a “family” of raisins (“Finish your breakfast quickly or we'll be late!”)

When she was born time stopped. The pediatrician spoke of the next visit. I stared blankly. Tiny new baby in my arms, a month was an unfathomable distance.

My daughter helps me to live as a “child of illusion.” Socks on rocking horse runners or a four-year-old body jammed into a six-month-old's outfit bring me back with a smile. Giving up hope of finishing anything without interruption is oddly relaxing. The moment is more fun than the to-do list, even when the moment is finding her gluing beads to furniture.

Click to read more ...

Dharma Dictionary: Satipatthana

Defined by Thanissaro Bhikkhu

Satipatthana (Pali) is often translated as “foundation of mindfulness,” which gives the impression that it refers to an object of meditation. This impression is reinforced when you see the four satipatthanas listed as body, feelings, mind and mental qualities.

But if you look at the early Buddhist texts, you find that satipatthana is a process, a way of establishing (upatthana) mindfulness (sati); hence the compound term. When the texts define the compound they give not a list of objects but four formulas describing an activity. Here's the first formula:

A meditator remains focused on the body in and of itself—ardent, alert, and mindful—putting aside greed and distress with reference to the world.

Each of the terms in this formula is important. Remaining focused can also be translated as “keeping track.” This refers to the element of concentration in the practice, as you hold to one particular theme or frame of reference amid the conflicting currents of experience. Ardent refers to the effort you put into the practice, trying to abandon unskillful states of mind and develop skillful ones in their stead, all the while trying to discern the difference between the two. Alert means being clearly aware of what's happening in the present. Mindful means being able to remember or recollect.

Click to read more ...